Rapport & Presence in Adult Learning

There are mornings when I wake up marveling at the opportunity I've had to earn three graduate degrees on top of my bachelor's degree—a journey that, when considered as a whole, ranks among the most rewarding experiences of my life. As we approach Veterans Day, my thoughts naturally turn to my father, a combat-wounded veteran of the Vietnam War. Despite his sharp intellect, he never earned a formal degree. Following the recent passing of my mother, I have sifted through her modest belongings and came across my father's GED certificate. It confirmed what I had known all my life: he never graduated from high school.

Though my father lacked formal education, he was my first and one of my most influential teachers. Many of you may understand the unique bond with a parent that comes from lessons not learned in a classroom, but through life events, more specifically through connection and example. This is in no way a slight to my mother, but my relationship with my father sparked a deep desire to learn from him to be like him. When I began my final formal degree program (in education, finally), I recall a conversation with him about John Dewey’s concept that “experience is education.” It seemed to please my father that beneath my layers of academic study, the pragmatic wisdom of learning through life’s practical lessons remained central to my approach. Dad and I didn’t always connect over things related to my position in the academy, but in this case we did and it leveraged a lot of fruitful and fun future conversations.

I write all that to remind us that in teaching, especially with adults, ther is an art of rapport—the ability to read the room, listen deeply, and respond in ways that communicate, I see you. I respect you. I’m with you.

Why Relationships Matter for Adult Learners

A strong, supportive relationship between learners and educators is not an accessory to teaching—it’s essential. Research consistently shows that trust, empathy, and connection directly impact motivation, engagement, and long-term success among adult learners.

• Supportive relationships can enhance motivation and engagement, creating conditions where learners feel safe, respected, and valued.

• Trust increases academic success, self-regulation, and persistence, especially for adults balancing work, family responsibilities and often even more.

• Educators who build rapport expand learning opportunities, allowing for deeper exploration, critical reflection, and risk-taking.

  
  

The Ripple Effects on Learning Outcomes

When adult learners experience authentic connection with their instructors, they don’t just retain information—they grow in confidence and identity. They might not think of it as such, but suddenly their prior life experience adds value (to say nothing of perspective) to their new knowledge and skills.

• Learners in collaborative learning relationships report increased knowledge, skills, and self-determination.

• Trusting, meaningful learning relationships improve attendance, engagement, and emotional regulation, even in diverse or challenging contexts.

• These bonds support goal setting and knowledge mastery, fostering resilience well beyond the classroom.

How Rapport Aligns with Adult Learning Theory

Andragogy—the framework popularized by Malcolm Knowles—reminds us that adult learners are autonomous, experience-rich, and purpose-driven. They thrive when learning is relevant, relational, and respectful.

Effective educator relationships operationalize andragogy in practice:

They make learning personally meaningful and encourage self-direction. (I won’t go down the rabbit hole, but I’ll step on the soapbox once more to say that, among all our wonderful educational theories and tools, differentiation within a social learning context remains exceptionally powerful (see Bandura; Tomlinson; UDL; or just talk to a teacher, there is plenty of experiential classroom evidence).

• They honor learners’ experience as a source of insight, not a deficit.

• They create the psychological safety required for problem-solving, reflection, and transformation—hallmarks of adult learning.

The Research Case for Rapport

Systematic reviews and meta-analyses affirm that positive learner–educator bonds:

1. Enhance academic performance and reduce dropout rates.

2. Buffer the effects of stress and improve retention.

3. Lead educators to teach more responsively, personalizing instruction when trust is established.

In short, rapport doesn’t just make learning feel better—it makes learning work better.

Presence as the Educator’s Practice of Study

For educators, rapport can be a discipline to be mastered if one makes a daily practice of noticing, listening, and responding with care. Richard Foster spoke of studying the “nonverbal books” of life, meaning those subtle, unspoken lessons written in silence, gesture, and experience. So too in teaching: every classroom, every pause, every learner’s hesitation is a text to be read with attention and respect.

We as educators need to attune ourselves to the quiet cues of adult learners, maybe in an online learning environment this is a delayed unmute, or a softened tone, a variance in the word count of a reflective post in a forum. This presence is not ancillary to instruction; it is pedagogy itself. It is how information becomes transformation.

In reflecting on the power of presence and relationship, I am reminded of a story told by André Gide. During a classroom lecture, it is said that Gide witnessed a moth emerging from its chrysalis which for him was a moment of quiet awe. When he shared his wonder with the professor, the response was cold and factual: “What, didn’t you know that chrysalis is the envelope of a butterfly? It’s perfectly natural.” What might have been a moment of connection and shared marvel became instead a moment of dismissal. Gide’s enthusiasm dissolved, and with it, a piece of his love for learning. (Thankfully, he would rebound well.)

Still this encounter lingers as a caution: education is not the mere delivery of information, but the nurturing of wonder, curiosity, even aspiration. For all the marvelous digital tools we have, education remains about human connection. When educators meet learners’ questions with empathy rather than indifference, they spark motivation that endures beyond the classroom. Just as Gide’s story reminds us to honor the extraordinary in the ordinary, research affirms that meaningful relationships are not peripheral but essential to transformative learning.

In the end, it is our willingness to see and celebrate the marvel within each learner that distinguishes not just good teaching, but education at its finest.